I’m an amateur word nerd.* So when I see the world “holiday” I can’t help but remember that it came into our language from the phrase “holy day”.
Because, of course, it used to be on the holy days observed by the church that the people were released from their work duties. You can still see this in our own calendars: Sunday is the day we weekly remember the resurrection, and many of us still have it off. Christmas vacation is rooted in the remembrance of Jesus’ birth, and spring break in the celebration of the events of Easter.
Thinking “holy day” when I see “holiday” is a pedantic bit of geekery, I admit it. At least, it is on the surface. But when I look deeper, it gives me a hint about what really makes for a restful holiday or a good vacation.
“I need to get away” – from what?
We talk about “needing to get away”, and I, for one, certainly do feel like I am escaping when I’m lucky enough to leave the city for the mountains, or my everyday life for a week of kicking back.
But what is it that we really need to get away from? It’s not like everyday life is a horror, for most of us. Our days are busy, sure, but for many of us, they’re filled with good things, with everyday duties like working and housekeeping, caring for kids and feeding ourselves and our families.
It makes me think that maybe I’m asking the wrong question. Instead of asking, “what do I need to get away from?”, I ought to be asking, “what do I need to run towards?”
Sabbath Rest
Work is good, but no one should be always working. It is rest that we are running towards. Resting after labor is so important that it was God himself who set us the example of how to do it.
And rest is not an emptiness, rest is a fullness. It is rest in the presence of God. It is being with, not being without. Even in seemingly run-of-the-mill vacation activities – things like swimming in the ocean or games of catch or long walks on a mountain trail – you can hear echoes of the Edenic rest our first parents enjoyed. In Eden, Adam and Eve walked with God in the cool of the evening. In our vacations today, we still take great joy in being somewhere beautiful in the company of those we love.
And even for introverts like me, when I am alone, I am not alone. The urge for silence and solitude is, really, an urge to be alone with God. To be still in His presence.
If you’ve read many books set in Regency England then you’ve likely heard of people sea bathing and taking the waters. While there was some indication that drinking the mineral rich waters from Bath or dipping in the sea at Brighton improved health, it was often the removal from everyday life that did as much good as anything.
"Mermaids At Brighton" by William Heath
Leaving your problems in London or at your country estate while you jaunted off to stroll down the street in front of the Royal Crescent and sip from the therapeutic spring water could improve a mood faster than anything else.
The Benefits of Changing Scenery
It’s the same reason so many people love vacations. It’s why you have to book your Spring Break hotel room six months in advance if you’re hitting one of the more popular beaches. It’s why travel sites thrive and credit cards offer hotel and airline points.
People have long acknowledged the benefits of changing scenery. Entire businesses have been built on people needing a new perspective on things.
Several years ago, I had a major decision to make. I struggled over it for months. Finally, it was coming down to the wire. I had to make the decision. One night, my husband took care of our daughter and I checked in to the hotel down the street. I was less than five miles from home, but it might have been five states because in that hotel room was nothing from my regular life.
My daughter didn’t cry and wake me up.
The dishes in the sink didn’t mock me for not cleaning them right after dinner.
No harsh buzz emitted from the laundry room informing me that the next load was ready to be folded.
The change of scenery let me spend focused time in prayer and thought so that I could make a decision.
The Difficulties of Getting Away
My husband is a minister and I am a stay at home mom and unpublished writer. Translation: Our work hours are ridiculous and we don’t make a lot of money. That means vacations are really difficult to fit in and afford.
While you may want to take and 30-day cruise across the Atlantic to explore Italy or even just spend a week at the beach, it isn’t always feasible. I dream of one day taking a research vacation to England. Right now, it’s not even in the budget book, but I still dream about it.
That doesn’t mean you can’t get away.
When we feel overtired and overstressed, we take a trip to my in-laws. It’s one place where we are expected to do virtually nothing. My fabulous mother-in-law takes care of the kids when they wake up so we get to sleep in. We get to take an afternoon to ourselves every trip and go stroll around their small-town main street.
It costs us nothing but gas to get there, and we usually leave feeling rested and refreshed.
We’ve also done staycations, where we change our perspective just by changing our expectations of the day. It doesn’t work quite as well as getting fully away, but it does help. We’ve done local overnights by booking hotels three or four days in advance. You have to be flexible about where you go, but you can get really good deals.
Every year we take a weekend trip with my family as well. Traveling in a group often defrays the cost of the trip. Plus it has the added benefit of allowing you to deepen important relationships on the trip.
The Real Benefit Isn’t In Getting Away
To really reap the benefits, you have to change your perspective. Vacations and changes in scenery are temporary. It’s why we keep taking trips and looking for the next break.
But it’s possible to bring that serenity and bliss home by allowing God to transform your mind and thinking.
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing, and perfect will. ~ Romans 12:2
When we allow God to form our thoughts, opinions, and desires to His will, we can find peace and tranquility among the chaos of everyday life. Imagine having vacations as a treat, something to enjoy instead of needing them just to maintain your equilibrium.
God can change your vision, making that same old couch, cubicle, or mini-van look like completely new scenery.
Photos by FreeDigitalPhotos.net unless otherwise noted.
When I prayed about writing this devotional, I began to think about marriages in this month of June when weddings abound and new husbands and wives begin their lives together.
I’m going to go out on a limb and say that every author on this site, and all of the readers that love this time period, have, at one time or another, wished they lived in the Regency era. (Of course, I know that had I lived then, I would certainly have been a tenant farmer’s wife at best or a scullery maid at worst; never one of the upper ten thousand!)
But, I can still daydream about reforming a handsome rake and having him declare his undying love for me while staring at me adoringly for the rest of my life. Now, however, my husband has gone a little gray, gained a few pounds around the middle, and almost never wears his top boots or carries his riding crop in the way of my dashing Regency husband.
Although almost all of our books end up with the hero falling hopelessly in love with our heroine; the truth is, in Regency times marriages were more likely arranged by the young couples’ parents, negotiated to combine estates and titles, or because one had to fill the empty coffers of the other. Today, the majority of marriages begin with love and are the sole decision of the two parties; no parents in sight.
In the Regency era, divorce rarely occurred; it was social suicide, and wives had to look the other way if their husbands decided to take an opera dancer as a mistress. Today, the divorce rate has skyrocketed and infidelity seems rampant along with workaholics, alcoholics and spendaholics. Keeping up with the Joneses in material possessions almost puts the Prince Regent to shame!
But if we read God’s Word, we realize men and women have gotten marriage wrong since Adam and Eve and the fall. Their union was shared in the Garden of Eden, walking beside God, Himself. Theirs was the perfect example. Yet after the fall, God still gives us direction on what marriage should be.
Genesis 2:24 – “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
Mark 10:9 – “Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate.”
Ephesians 5:22-23 – “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church…”
Ephesians 5:25 – “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and
Hebrews 13:4 – “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled…”
I Peter 3:3-4 – “[Wives] do not let your adornment be merely outward…rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit.”
I Peter 3:7 – “[Husbands] likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife…heirs together of the grace of life.”
God’s marriage made husband and wife one, never to separate. He gave us instructions on how to relate to one another, and where to keep our focus. God’s plan is that we never stray from our spouse, ever. And He asks of wives a gentle and quiet spirit while the husbands give us honor and understanding, heirs together.
But we live in a fallen world, and none of us can keep that blueprint for a perfect union all the time. So we see that while the grass always looks greener on the other side, our Regency counterparts didn’t have it any more together than we do today.
But I am thankful that God gave us that blueprint and His forgiveness when go outside those lines. And I think I will go give my far-from-Regency husband a hug!
When I was about to be married, the women of my church threw me a shower, at which each of them gave me a favorite recipe to put in a cookbook for our new home. And though I still use Marion’s directions for teriyaki chicken, and though Sandy’s roasted veggies are still a favorite at our house, the real treasure in that cookbook isn’t the recipes. It’s the marriage advice each woman wrote down alongside her recipe.
Since this June has been all about marriage here at Regency Reflections, I thought I’d pass on the best of that advice – the advice that’s proved the most true in this first decade of my marriage. And since it comes from a woman who’s currently in the middle of her fourth decade of marriage – my mom, Betsy Barber – you can trust that it has more wisdom than anything I could come up with out of my short experience.
So, here they are, the words I see every time I turn to my mother’s recipe for the perfect pie crust:
For those of you who haven’t had thirty years practice interpreting my mom’s handwriting, here’s what it says:
1. Constant prayer
2. Frequent, joyful sex
3. Regular time spent together
4. Continual forgiveness, continual repentance.
5. Conscious support of his career and hobbies
6. Encourage 10X more often than any critique.
And there at the bottom, added in after the original composition, is my favorite part: “Remember – if it’s good for Adam, it is good for you.”
That’s the part that I hadn’t read anywhere else in my marriage prep, and it’s the part I still wish more people talked about when they talk to married couples: since you’re one flesh, what’s good for one of you – what builds one up, what encourages one, what heartens one – benefits the other. Anything that helps my husband helps me. If something makes him a better Christian, if anything gives him joy, if anything delights his heart, it’s to my benefit that he has it, because it means I’ll be married to a better, happier, godlier man.
And the same is true the other way around. If something encourages me, if something builds me up, it’s to Adam’s benefit to see that I get it, because then he enjoys a marriage to a happier, healthier, godlier wife.
I could go on about the other points on that list, but this blog entry is supposed to be kept at a reasonable length. Suffice it to say: all the points on that list are good . . . especially the second one. 😉
Wanting to spare the heroine from an arranged marriage to an ogre, the hero suggests that he marries her and they elope. The heroine agrees, since she has had a tendre for the hero since she was a schoolgirl. Unfortunately, the 1754 Hardwick Marriage Act has stiffened the laws of marriage. The heroine hasn’t yet reached her majority and they can’t take the time to obtain a special license in London. Waiting for the banns to be called is out of the question, as that will take three weeks and the parents and ogre suitor will catch up with them long before then, even if they can obtain parental permission for the under age—under twenty-one—heroine. Their only alternative is to elope to Gretna Green in Scotland.
Unfortunately again, Scotland is close to four hundred miles away. They must hire a post chase or go on horseback and, because the journey will likely take more than a week to accomplish, they will have to stay overnight before they are married, unacceptable to these two proper—other than eloping—young people. The situation appears hopeless.
Except it isn’t. The hero has some friends amongst the fishermen who have told him about carrying an eloping couple to an alternative marriage location.
Eloping in Style
In approximately fifteen hours of sailing,
the eloping couple can reach one of the Channel Islands, mainly the Island of Guernsey. Evidence presents us with the knowledge that boats waited at Southampton, Hampshire, to carry eloping couples across the channel. Logic says Plymouth, Falmouth, and a few other southern ports just might have provided the same service.
Guernsey is closer to France than England. Although it belongs to England, many of the laws differ from those of England. The marriage laws are one of those even today.
So many couples eloped to Guernsey that tracking the history of residents of the island has proven difficult, for distinguishing those who simply arrived in St. Peter Port to get married in haste, from those who lived on the island and married in the same parish, isn’t easy two hundred years later. Genealogists have focused on whether or not couples later baptized their children in that same parish in order to trace ancestry to Guernsey.
Nowadays, one does not need a license to marry in a Church of England ceremony on Guernsey. One does need a license for a civil ceremony on Guernsey.
So if your couple finds themselves hundreds of miles from Gretna Green, they can hop onto a fishing boat, or perhaps the hero’s yacht, and sail across the Narrow Sea to a channel island. First, however, he might wish to ensure that the heroine doesn’t get seasick on the way.
Hi everyone, Naomi here today, talking about real-life love, and ready to have some fun with it!
So often in romance novels, especially Regency romances, a couple is thrust together and sometimes even forced to marry due to circumstances beyond their control. In fact, I’m finishing a novel now where indeed, the hero and heroine are caught together in an unbecoming manner, and you guessed it: there’s wedding bells ringing by halfway through the story. It doesn’t matter that they’re not in love and didn’t want to marry, by the end of the book they’ll be head-over-heels for one another.
But that’s one of the wonderful things about fiction: everything always works out in the end.
If only real life always turned out so well. Unfortunately our lives seem to go the exact opposite direction from those of our romance novel counterparts. In society today, we meet, fall in love, get married, and then fall out of love and get unmarried in almost less time than we spend on the love and wedding stuff. No one forces us to marry because we get caught kissing or sneaking off to enjoy a few private moments of conversation. Yet how does our divorce rate compare to that of Regency England?
Yikes! Probably better not look to closely at that one. So amidst this month of June with all its wedding bells and happily-ever-afters. Let’s take a quick look at three principles that can help keep romance alive in our real-life marriages.
1. Spend time together. You might think this one rather obvious. After all, at one point, you and your hubby spent a whole lot of time together . . . back when he was your future hubby or first dating you. But somehow, as the years pass, you each become busy with different things. Working, raising kids, buying a house, making improvements to the house, carting your kids to soccer and ballet, and the list goes on. Yet it’s still important that you spend time together. Hire a babysitter for one night a month. Or feed your kids hotdogs and put them to bed early once every couple weeks. Then make (or buy, if you’re me) a nice dinner for your husband.
2. Pay attention. Every woman wants to feel that her husband loves her. But on the flip side, women also need to ask themselves whether they make their husbands feel loved. Do you know when he has a bad day at work or a mountain of chores to do at home? Or do you let him live his own life until you need something from him? One of the easiest ways to pay attention is to greet him when he gets home. Whether he’s been at work or running errands, put down the phone, spatula or laundry basket, and call your kids away from their toys or the TV to greet their dad. If you make your man feel like he’s important to you, I’m betting he’ll reciprocate and show his wonderful wife how important she is to him.
3. Say thank you. Having a general attitude of gratefulness toward the man you married can do miracles for your relationship. Of course you’re grateful that he pays some (or all) of the bills and takes the trash out on trash night. But do you tell him “thank you” or simply take for granted that he’ll work endless hours?
Now let’s take the situation a step farther. Regardless of how wonderful a wife you are, there will always be those busy times when you ask for help with sweeping or putting the kids to bed or doing the dishes or any other number of household tasks. When your husband takes time out of his busy schedule to help you, do you thank him? Or do you look at the kitchen floor, see a dog hair in the corner, and tell him he didn’t do a good enough job sweeping? Try to be grateful for the effort your husband puts into helping rather than pick out his imperfections.
So there you have it. Three simple ideas. None of them are dramatic or life altering, but if you work hard at loving your husband, you might just might find real life turning out as wonderful as the lives of all those romance novel heroines.
****
A mother of two young boys, Naomi Rawlings spends her days picking up, cleaning, playing and, of course, writing. Her husband pastors a small church in Michigan’s rugged Upper Peninsula, where her family shares its ten wooded acres with black bears, wolves, coyotes, deer and bald eagles. Naomi and her family live only three miles from Lake Superior, where the scenery is beautiful and they average 200 inches of snow per winter. Naomi writes bold, dramatic stories containing passionate words and powerful journeys. Her debut novel, Sanctuary for a Lady, released in April of 2012. For more information about Naomi and her writing, visit www.naomirawlings.com
Gentle Readers, I’d like to take a moment to introduce you to the newest member of the Regency Reflections family! You can learn more about Kristy L. Cambron on the Blog Editor bio page. We’re so excited to have her with us. Welcome, Kristy!
The ball at Netherfield, Pride and Prejudice (2005)
I love the power of dance to drop a layer of enchantment over a room.
I can recall one of the first things I said to my husband on our wedding reception dance floor. The lights had been dimmed and as the notes of our special song played, I whispered: “And my dance card will always be full...”
I meant it. For all the years my husband and I would share after that moment, I knew my future dances would always have a special partner.
Stunning dresses. Dapper gentlemen. Ladies hidden behind their fans. Lively music and sophisticated steps… Today that all-important first dance may be synonymous with the wedding celebration, but the Regency ballroom was just as alive with color and spirit as our reception dance floors are today.
Or dare I say, more so?
Though weddings were primarily private family affairs in the Regency (as opposed to the social events we see today), ballrooms and wedding parties alike were brought to life by vivid dance reels and lively music. After all, the ball was the social event by which all others were judged. Moreover, to grasp a partner’s hand in dance was often the only socially acceptable touch between an unmarried man and woman.
Affection was born and engagements followed, all over the steps of the most popular dances of the day…
~ The Cotillion
Distinguishing characteristics: Originated in France during the 18th century. Includes four couples dancing in square formations with elaborate steps and changing partners. French for petticoat, the term cotillion was said to have been coined after the flash of petticoats that could be seen as partners swiftly changed on the dance floor.
Interesting Fact: Georgette Heyer’s historical romance, Cotillion (1953), is one of her much loved Regency novels. Though a generally cheery novel, the title is mirrored in a story that centers around the overlapping love lives of four couples (much like the steps of the cotillion dance itself).
~ TheQuadrille
Distinguishing characteristics: Another dance import from France. Similar to the cotillion, it includes four couples dancing in square sets but omits the repeating “chorus” dance. Was later combined with the popular waltz to form a hybrid of the two dances, the Waltz Cotillion (as seen in this video – click HERE).
Interesting fact: Introduced early in the Regency and immensely popular by 1815, the quadrille was a very lively dance that often adapted music from stage plays and was thought to be quite flirtatious at the time. A form of the quadrille can still be seen today in modern day square dancing.
~ La Boulanger
Distinguishing characteristics: A simpler dance for three couples. Often used as the last dance of the evening at a ball or party.
Interesting fact: As many dances could include quite intricate steps, dance masters were often hired by wealthier families to educate their children on the art of the popular dances. (A very popular dance master of the day was Thomas Wilson, who published many influential books on the art of dancing and etiquette.) For you Jane Austen fans, la Boulanger was a favorite of the authoress and was a dance declared by name in her novels.
~ TheWaltz
Distinguishing characteristics: First popular in Vienna (1780s) but introduced to the English ballroom during the Regency. New sensation but slow to catch on because of the “closeness” enjoyed by two dancing partners.
Interesting fact: The waltz caused a bit of a scandal when it first popped onto the English ballroom scene around 1810. Because of the close proximity shared by two dancing partners, the embrace was thought improper and in fact, was often ridiculed by early opponents. In 1825, the Oxford English Dictionary actually defined the waltz as “riotous and indecent”. (Boyd Hilton, A Mad, Bad, and Dangerous People? England 1783–1846 (Oxford U P 2006).
Feet tapping for more references? Here are some good ones:
Click [HERE] to see an example of a stunning Regency Era ball gown.
Click [HERE] to hear samples of Regency Era dance music.
Click [HERE] to learn more about Regency dances from the Jane Austen Centre at Bath.
Whether it was one of the English country dances with the fun names (such as the “Teasing Made Easy”) or the classic Minuet, our Regency friends certainly knew how to fill up their dance cards.
LaurieAlice: I’ve known Louise for many years and know she is her own worst critic. She is hard on herself in describing her own work. Let me assure you, this is truly a Regency romance.
Meet Louise M. Gouge
Interview Questions with Louise Gouge:
LAE: What drew you to write during the Regency Time Period?
Louise: I know it’s an old answer, but I just love Jane Austen’s classic books, so I wanted to try my hand at a Regency story. The strict social and moral codes seem to make happiness for a hero and heroine next to impossible. Can my couple who come from different social classes find true love in spite of all the social restrictions they face? Well, of course. It’s a romance. But can I make it an interesting journey along the way? That’s the challenge that Jane Austen met with success every time, in my opinion. I can only hope to do the same.
LAE: Tell us what year your book is set in and why you chose that particular time.
Louise: My book begins in late 1813 and ends in early 1814. My hero, a British major, has been wounded in the American War, which England was fighting at the same time they were fighting Napoleon (as was the rest of Europe). But the battle my hero fights to find his place in English society is every bit as difficult as the struggle he found in America. I chose this particular time period because I think wartimes always make interesting backdrops for romances.
A Proper Companion by Louise M. Gouge
LAE: What’s your favorite, unique Regency aspect of the novel, something you wouldn’t be able to include in a novel set in another place or time?
Louise: Actually, I can’t think of a single thing. I’m too new at writing in this period to know all of the clever little stuff. (This is my first full-length Regency.) I must have some nerve, right? But I hope readers will find my hero and heroine compelling and will enjoy their pathway to happily ever after.
LAE: What are the biggest challenges to writing in the Regency Period?
Louise: Regency readers are very particular and knowledgeable about the era. I try very hard not to make a mistake, but I’m sure something has slipped through that I wasn’t aware of. Still, no one has slammed me so far. If I do make an error, I hope readers will gently inform me!
LAE: Who is your favorite Regency Author?
Louise: Much to my shame, I haven’t read any of the old Regency authors who really established the genre, which may be the reason I don’t know those unique things about the era. I do enjoy the stories by my fellow Love Inspired Historical authors: Regina Scott, Mary Moore, and Deborah Hale. From other publishers, I love Laurie Alice Eakes, MaryLu Tyndall, and Linore Rose Burkard.
LAE: What is your favorite Regency setting; e.g., London, country house, small village?
Louise: I like both the country manor house (with its village) and the London townhouse. The lavish homes in either place just stagger me, especially when one considers the poverty that existed barely a stone’s throw from either home.
LAE: What makes your hero and heroine uniquely Regency?
Louise: Other than the historical events taking place in the background, I actually think my hero and heroine’s story could be set in a rather wide span of English history from mid-Eighteenth Century to well into the Victorian age, perhaps even touching the Edwardian age. The main conflicts separating my would-be sweethearts are the societal structure and hero’s lack of career options. In England, these were basically unchanged for centuries, as we can see in the recent BBC television series, Downton Abbey.
LAE: Tell us about your book.
Louise:A Proper Companion, With her father’s death, Anna Newfield loses everything—her home, her inheritance, and her future. Her only piece of good fortune is a job offer from wounded major Edmond Grenville, whose mother requires a companion. The Dowager Lady Greystone is controlling and unwelcoming, but Anna can enjoy Edmond’s company, even if she knows the aristocratic war hero can never return her love. Even amid the glittering ballrooms of London, nothing glows brighter for Edmond than Anna’s gentle courage. Loving her means going against his family’s rigid command. Yet how can he walk away when his heart may have found its true companion?
LAE: When did your novel release and with what publisher?
Louise:A Proper Companion, from Harlequin’s Love Inspired Historicals, released in June 2012.
About Louise: Award-winning Florida author Louise M. Gouge writes historical fiction, calling her stories “threads of grace woven through time.” In addition to numerous other awards, Louise is the recipient of the prestigious Inspirational Readers’ Choice Award for her 2005 novel, Hannah Rose. With her great love of history and research, Louise has traveled to several of her locations to ensure the accuracy of her stories’ settings. When she isn’t writing, she and her husband love to visit historical sites and museums. Her favorite Bible verse is “He shall choose our inheritance for us” (Psalm 47:4), a testimony to her belief that God has chosen a path for each believer. To seek that path and to trust His wisdom is to find the greatest happiness in life. Read about Louise’s books at her Web site http://blog.Louisemgouge.com
For a chance to win A Proper Companion by Louise M. Gouge, leave a comment. We will draw a winner on June 20, 2012. Be sure to check back on this comment thread on that date to find out who won.
Do you remember the first Jane Austen novel you ever read?
My first Jane Austen novel was an illustrated edition of Sense and Sensibility. I was hooked after only one chapter! And it was not only the colorful descriptions and witty dialogue that drew me in—I remember being fascinated but the accompanying illustrations. I know longer own my first copy of Sense and Sensibility, but to this day, I recall the illustrations in vivid detail.
One of the most celebrated illustrators of Jane Austen novels was Charles Edmund Brock. Brock lived from 1870-1938 and is widely recognized for his illustrations and line drawings of novels by Bronte, Elliot, Thackery, and many more. Even though Brock did not live during the regency period, he had a unique ability to capture the essence of the period in his illustrations. Here are a few well-known illustrations for you to enjoy:
Sense & Sensibility:
Don’t you just love that phrase, “How to …”? How-to books, advice columns, lists of do’s and don’ts abound. God’s word has much great advice, and “secrets” abound, especially about loving. For example, Ephesians 4:32:
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Since this one passage is so rich with gems for loving our husbands, let’s go no further.
Be kind to him. Choose kindness, even when he doesn’t earn or deserve it. Think back to how you both showed each other your best during courtship and engagement, were you ever sour, moody, or impatient then?
Be tenderhearted toward him and his failings. Love covers a multitude of sins (failings), so “put on the love cover”(1Peter 4:8) when your husband’s weaknesses affect you. An unexpected smile can go a long way toward softening hearts.
A forgiving attitude will bring peace of mind and peace in your marriage. Try forgiving in advance and not even entering into a dispute or criticism though you are in the right. He will be so relieved that you “let him off the hook”. You will be amazed at the peace that will dwell in your relationship. This forgiving in advance is sometimes called forbearance. God’s forbearing love chose us to be his children, and we should not aspire to anything less.
… This was to show God’s righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins. Romans 3: 25b
Just touching on scripture’s rich words on forbearing love can inspire us to imitate Christ’s love toward our God-given husbands. Forgiving in advance is a mighty tool from God to improve our marriages.
I’m an amateur word nerd.* So when I see the world “holiday” I can’t help but remember that it came into our language from the phrase “holy day”.
But it’s possible to bring that serenity and bliss home by allowing God to transform your mind and thinking.
