Betrayal leaves no visible wound, only a hardened place in the heart—scanned, protected, and difficult to penetrate. The question becomes, do we want to heal, or can we linger in hate and fire?
Betrayal is one of the most disorienting experiences a person can endure. It does not arrive all at once; it sweeps through you in stages, much like grief. First comes shock, then self-doubt. Was I naïve? Was I fooled? Were there signs I ignored because I wanted to believe? You replay conversations, gestures, moments of connection, wondering which parts were real and which were carefully constructed illusions. There is a particular cruelty in realizing you were allowed—invited—into a false sense of security.
What makes betrayal hurt the most is not just the deception, but the bond you believed you shared. Often, trust is built. Often values are mirrored: bonding on marginalization, feminism, activism, or other deeply held beliefs. You thought we saw the world the same way.
And with this bond, one can say, I’m not alone, not alone in the mission, not alone in the place and time. Basically, I’m not alone or lonely anymore.
Finding a like-minded person can feel like hope in an isolating world. And when that bond proves false, it shakes more than the relationship—it shakes your foundation, your sense of reality. You begin to question everything. What was authentic? What was performative? And inevitably, the most haunting question surfaces: If I can be misled, how do I trust again?
This question lives at the heart of Fire Sword and Sea. Jacquotte Delahaye wrestles with trust at every stage of her life. As a cook in a tavern, she must decide who entering the building is safe, and who is not.
When Jacquotte becomes a pirate, she’s surrounded by a crew whose survival depends on loyalty; that question becomes life-or-death. In love, it becomes even more perilous: who deserves her heart, and who should she flee from? We all recognize the trope of the “bad boy, bad girl”—and even then, there’s an understanding of risk.
Hoping to expand our happiness, and unfortunately, to our detriment, we try. Then we fail, and every reason that seemed right masked all those wrong reasons.
In Jacquotte’s story, betrayal cuts sharply when it comes from a friend, someone she would die for. The wound left behind is unforgettable. Her heart leans to be more guarded. As readers follow her journey, I wish for them to reflect on their own lives: and asking the tough questions:
Where are they most vulnerable?
Where does trust feel most fragile?
How do they respond when someone they love or admire proves to be painfully human—or worse, willfully harmful?
Recovery from betrayal is difficult, especially when it comes from someone you love. It hurts down deep when your admiration was for naught.
Yet living with a grudge is harder. Holding on to ill will and being unable to forgive is terrible. These conditions are like living behind armor so heavy it prevents connection altogether. No one wants to become the person who’s constantly looking over their shoulder, questioning every kindness, every soft word. And yet, as a member of a marginalized community, I can say that this struggle is familiar. Betrayal is not theoretical; it is lived.
President Reagan famously said, “Trust, but verify,” when referencing his mortal enemies. The word enemy implies intention, while mortal suggests an endgame. Jacquotte survives betrayal.
Mostly.
She carries with her a scar—a hardened scab over part of her heart.
The scab is protective. It’s tender. Difficult to penetrate.
One of the most personal and honest aspects of Jacquotte Delahaye’s character is how she navigates betrayal while balancing mercy, forgiveness, awareness, and pain. She is not idolized. She is real. A crew member betrays her profoundly, and yet she must decide how to move forward, because leadership demands clarity. If you are on her crew, she must be prepared to sacrifice everything for you.
I’m not suggesting anyone make unwise sacrifices for those who’ve harmed them. Some acts are unforgivable.
But we live in a moment that demands deeper conversations about accountability, justice, and grace. There’s a growing urge to harden our hearts—to refuse forgiveness entirely—especially when apologies arrive only after consequences. And yet, we must weigh these decisions carefully, as captains of our own ships.
I do not claim to have the right answers. The Jacquotte I wrote doesn’t. She is flawed. She walks a delicate balance between forgiveness and holy anger.
So I think about Jacquotte. As I went on a release week tour, she was on my heart. She lived an experience that left marks, taught her caution, and forced us to decide who she’d become in the aftermath.
In life, the question is not whether we will be wounded, but when to choose healing—and what parts of ourselves we are willing to risk again.
This week’s booklist:
A book on recovering from betrayal:
Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma by Peter A. Levine & Ann Frederick
This focuses on the body’s response to healing from psychological trauma and painful memories.
Books centering betrayal in fiction:
Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn
A psychological thriller about marriage gone terribly wrong.
A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara
Explores betrayal among friends and how certain ruptures change lives forever.
Fire Sword and Sea by Vanessa Riley. This is a fast paced saga that illustrates betrayal and community.
These are fictional accounts. We need good fiction to help us escape disappointments to learn to master forgiveness and fire.
This week, I highlight Black Pearl Books. You guys are amazing. Thank you for the hospitality in Austin.
Consider purchasing Fire Sword and Sea from Black Pearl Books or from
one of my partners in the fight, bookstores large and small, who are in hanging with me.
Come on, my readers, my beautiful listeners. Let’s keep everyone excited about Fire Sword and Sea.
You can find my notes on Substack or on my website, VanessaRiley.com, under the podcast link in the About tab.
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