It started innocently enough. I’d been away for a weekend of trips. Monday morning, I thought, Let me check my email. That’s when the onslaught began.
A note — a perfectly polite one — popped to the top:
“Hi Vanessa,Thank you for writing such a wonderful story. I’d love to share my thoughts on Goodreads and help more people discover it.Warm regards,Rachel.”
Thank you, Rachel. I don’t know what book you read that moved you to writeright me (yes, she wrote right), but thanks.
I kept going through my emails, and Rachel wrote again.
“Hi there,Are you around? If you’re interested in getting the review, just reply with the word ‘Review.’ I’ll take it from there!”
Now, I already suspected Rachel was a bot. But Miss Rachel wasn’t done. She sent another message — and this time, she rudely implied that I’d missed a deadline.
In the entirety of my writing career, I’ve missed exactly one deadline. One. There have been times when I’ve needed more time, but I’ve always negotiated that weeks, sometimes months, in advance. The only time I ever truly missed a deadline — by two weeks — was during COVID, when everyone in my household (and extended family) caught it. It was stressful. I’m a Type A engineer by training, and believe me, that editor reminds me of it to this day.
But I digress.
As writers, we already have enough pressure. The market is shifting. Publishing lines are tightening. The expectation that social media alone can move huge swaths of books is both ridiculous and still the fairy dust traditional publishing counts on. And beyond all that pressure — the bots are coming for us.
So instead of holding a séance for spam or blocking every Gmail address with numbers in it, I decided to sic one robot on another. Thus began the latest episode in my ongoing saga: Robot vs. Robot: The War of the AI Cousins.
Now I’ve had my run in with Chat – please listen to Season 1: Episode 42 – AI Can’t Fake the Funk or the Fire. And you’ll see AI it’s everywhere.
So, I started by feeding these bot emails into ChatGPT. I wanted to see what it would say about its more mischievous relatives.
Take “Lilia C. Oram,” for example — a self-proclaimed Book Marketing Specialist who wrote me an essay-length love letter about my novel Queen of Exiles.
Her message read like a Ph.D. dissertation in flattery:
“Your novel Queen of Exiles is an exquisite and triumphant reimagining of Haiti’s Queen Marie-Louise Covidavid Christophe…”
Can’t you just hear the B.S. in that framing? She continued with alliteration worthy of a thesaurus marathon:
“With the right strategy, this extraordinary story can reach readers and institutions that celebrate narratives of resistance, identity, and freedom…”
Then, naturally, came the sales pitch — A+ Content Optimization, Goodreads Listopia placement, Amazon keyword targeting. In short, every SEO buzzword known to humankind.
ChatGPT barked and said:
Red Flags:
* Overly formal “praise-bomb” introduction.
* Immediate pivot to services.
* Fake “strategy” jargon — terms like “visual storytelling campaigns,” “Goodreads Listopia placement,” and “Amazon A+ content optimization” are standard scam-bait phrases. None of those services require outside contractors, and many are impossible or against Goodreads/Amazon policy.
* Generic Gmail addresses — a real agency would email from a company domain.
* Unrealistic promises — “global recognition,” “reach institutions,” “connect with readers of The House of Eve.” All empty marketing fluff.
My goodness, ChatGPT. I like your style. You’re kind of blatant.
The Booker Prize Blunder
Then came Imran. According to his email, he ran “The Booker Prize Longlist Book Club.”
Now, the real Booker Prize is one of literature’s jewels. So when “Imran” wrote to say his club was “captivated by The Bone Thief” and wanted to feature me in an upcoming author session, I nearly spat out my tea.
There were several problems. First, I didn’t write The Bone Thief. That’s Vanessa Lillie. And second, The Bone Thief did not win the Booker Prize — that was The Bone People by Keri Hulme in 1985. Well, I’ll be. I guess the bot thought all the Vanessas and people with bone books were the same.
ChatGPT wasn’t having it:
* You didn’t write The Bone Thief.A real literary book club — especially one invoking the Booker Prize — would never confuse your work with another author’s. This was a mass email sent to hundreds of writers using scraped names and random book titles.
* “The Booker Prize Longlist Book Club” doesn’t exist.The real Booker organization has an official site and verified socials. They don’t cold-email authors, and they never host “open author sessions” via random Gmail accounts.
* No institutional email address.If it’s not from @thebookerprizes.com or @bookerprizefoundation.org, it’s not real.
* The tone is suspiciously perfect.Words like captivated, haunting, moral complexity, and honored to host you — pure AI-generated flattery.
* The setup leads to a hook.If you reply, you’ll probably get a follow-up asking for a “booking fee,” “Zoom production support donation,” or “press kit submission cost.” That’s the classic second-step scam.
ChatGPT’s advice was simple:
* Don’t reply. Any engagement confirms your email is active.
* Mark as spam or phishing — it helps your provider learn.
* Report impersonations to the real organizations being mimicked.
When the Bots Come Marching In
If you’re an author, chances are you’ve met a bot like Imran, Lilia, or Rachel. They’re part of a growing spam ecosystem aimed squarely at creatives — the AI-powered, copy-paste, faux-professional outreach bot.
They know how to flatter. They know how to mimic sincerity. They even sprinkle in the occasional Oxford comma to seem literate.
So I asked Chat, what are we going to do about your cousins?”
And to its credit, ChatGPT turned into a snitch:
Chat said the following are tells:
* Vague praise.
* Immediate offer. They pivot fast to “services,” “placements,” or “features.”
* Gmail or Outlook addresses. No legitimate organization uses liliacoram64@gmail.com.
* Unrealistic promises. “Global recognition” is not a measurable Key Peformance Indicator.
* Keyword spells. “Just reply with the word REVIEW.” (Only bots or IG marketers talk like this.)
This is the new reality. I used to fear that robots would take my jobs.Now, I see they are being employed to spam my inboxes. Oh how the mighty have fallen.
But in a strange way, these exchanges remind me that technology, for all its intelligence, still lacks instinct. The bots can simulate empathy, but they can’t feel the exhaustion of 3 a.m. revisions, the fear of missing deadlines, or the desperation of wanting sincere recognition for our hard work.
They don’t know what it means to live a life of creative — only how to market badly to a creator.
Final Advice to Fellow Authors from a thug’s cousin, ChatGpt:
* Never click.
* Never reply.
* Always verify before you believe.
* And if the flattery is too good, assume it’s fake. No one writes that flowery for free.
And this is from Vanessa – remember your work is worthy of praise and real emails. Don’t give up or give space to the bots.
Books to help on our writing journey are:
5‑Minute Book Marketing for Authors: Great for if you’re short on time but still want consistent effort.
Book Marketing for Authors: Get Ready, Get Set, Succeed!: A solid all-round guide for authors transitioning from writing to marketing.
And of course the books mentioned by the bots:
The Bone Thief by Vanessa Lillie When a Native teenager vanishes from her small town—a place with dark ties to an elite historical society—archaeologist Syd Walker is called to investigate…from bestselling author Vanessa Lillie.
The Bone People, A Booker Prize Winner by Keri Hulme is a novel about the complicated relationships between three outcasts of mixed European and Maori heritage
The House of Eve by Sadeqa Johnson explores what it means to be a woman and a mother in the 1950s, and how much one is willing to sacrifice to achieve her greatest goal.
This week, I’m highlighting The Book Worm Bookstore through their website and Bookshop.org
We are three months away from Fire Sword and Sea—Help me build the momentum for this historical fiction. Please spread the word and preorder this disruptive narrative about lady pirates in the 1600s. They are women, many our Black and Indigenous. All want a better way of life. Piracy is legal. It’s their answer. It’s their prayer. This saga releases January 13, 2026. The link on my website shows retailers large and small who have set up preorders for this title. Get the collector cards. Who is on your crew?
Show notes include a list of the books mentioned in this broadcast.
You can find my notes on Substack or on my website, VanessaRiley.com under the podcast link in the About tab.
If you’re ready to move with purpose and power, hit that like button and subscribe and share Write of Passage. Never miss a moment. We have work to do. And I need You on my team.
Thank you for listening. Hopefully, you’ll come again. This is Vanessa Riley.
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