{"id":754,"date":"2025-10-29T10:17:30","date_gmt":"2025-10-29T10:17:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/christianregency.com\/blog\/?p=754"},"modified":"2025-10-29T10:17:30","modified_gmt":"2025-10-29T10:17:30","slug":"how-to-maintain-a-flourishing-husband","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/2025\/10\/29\/how-to-maintain-a-flourishing-husband\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;How to Maintain a Flourishing Husband&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When I was about to be married, the women of my church threw me a shower, at which each of them gave me a favorite recipe to put in a cookbook for our new home. And though I still use Marion&#8217;s directions for teriyaki chicken, and though Sandy&#8217;s roasted veggies are still a favorite at our house, the real treasure in that cookbook isn&#8217;t the recipes. It&#8217;s the marriage advice each woman wrote down alongside her recipe.<\/p><div id=\"vanes-2500435679\" class=\"vanes-content vanes-entity-placement\" style=\"margin-top: 2px;margin-right: 2px;margin-bottom: 2px;margin-left: 2px;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/fireswordandsea.htm\" aria-label=\"Fire Sword &amp; Sea\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?fit=1706%2C2560&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Fire Sword &amp; Sea\"  srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?w=1706&ssl=1 1706w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=200%2C300&ssl=1 200w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=683%2C1024&ssl=1 683w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=768%2C1152&ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=1024%2C1536&ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=1365%2C2048&ssl=1 1365w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?w=1280&ssl=1 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" width=\"569\" height=\"853\"   \/><\/a><\/div>\n<p>Since this June has been all about marriage here at Regency Reflections, I thought I&#8217;d pass on the best of that advice &#8211; the advice that&#8217;s proved the most true in this first decade of my marriage. And since it comes from a woman who&#8217;s currently in the middle of her\u00a0<em>fourth<\/em> decade of marriage &#8211; my mom, Betsy Barber &#8211; you can trust that it has more wisdom than anything I could come up with out of my short experience.<\/p>\n<p>So, here they are, the words I see every time I turn to my mother&#8217;s recipe for the perfect pie crust:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/christianregency.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/IMG_0783.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-1034\" title=\"marriage advice (Betsy Barber)\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/christianregency.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/IMG_0783-1024x768.jpg?resize=584%2C438\" alt=\"\" width=\"584\" height=\"438\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/IMG_0783.jpg?resize=1024%2C768&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/IMG_0783.jpg?resize=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/IMG_0783.jpg?resize=400%2C300&amp;ssl=1 400w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/IMG_0783.jpg?w=1280&amp;ssl=1 1280w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/IMG_0783.jpg?w=1920&amp;ssl=1 1920w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 584px) 100vw, 584px\" \/><\/a>\u00a0For those of you who haven&#8217;t had thirty years practice interpreting my mom&#8217;s handwriting, here&#8217;s what it says:<\/p>\n<p>1. Constant prayer<\/p>\n<p>2. Frequent, joyful sex<\/p>\n<p>3. Regular time spent together<\/p>\n<p>4. Continual forgiveness, continual repentance.<\/p>\n<p>5. Conscious support of his career and hobbies<\/p>\n<p>6. Encourage 10X more often than any critique.<\/p>\n<p>And there at the bottom, added in after the original composition, is my favorite part: &#8220;Remember &#8211; if it&#8217;s good for Adam, it is good for you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s the part that I hadn&#8217;t read anywhere else in my marriage prep, and it&#8217;s the part I still wish more people talked about when they talk to married couples: since you&#8217;re one flesh, what&#8217;s good for one of you &#8211; what builds one up, what encourages one, what heartens one &#8211; benefits the other. Anything that helps my husband helps me. If something makes him a better Christian, if anything gives him joy, if anything delights his heart, it&#8217;s to my benefit that he has it, because it means I&#8217;ll be married to a better, happier, godlier man.<\/p>\n<p>And the same is true the other way around. If something encourages me, if something builds me up, it&#8217;s to Adam&#8217;s benefit to see that I get it, because then he enjoys a marriage to a happier, healthier, godlier wife.<\/p>\n<p>I could go on about the other points on that list, but this blog entry is supposed to be kept at a reasonable length. Suffice it to say: all the points on that list are good . . . especially the second one. \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n<p><strong>Question for You:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>What&#8217;s your best piece of advice for a new bride?<\/p>\n<p>Peace of Christ to you,<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/churchyear.blogspot.com\/\">Jessica Snell<\/a><\/p>\n<p id=\"rop\"><small>Originally posted 2012-06-27 10:00:00. <\/small><\/p><div id=\"vanes-4101333248\" class=\"vanes-after-content vanes-entity-placement\" style=\"margin-top: 3px;margin-right: 3px;margin-bottom: 3px;margin-left: 3px;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?fit=1080%2C1350&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Listen to the Write of Passage Weekly Podcast\"  srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?w=1080&ssl=1 1080w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?resize=240%2C300&ssl=1 240w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?resize=819%2C1024&ssl=1 819w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?resize=768%2C960&ssl=1 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" width=\"540\" height=\"675\"   \/><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When I was about to be married, the women of my church threw me a shower, at which each of them gave me a favorite recipe to put in a cookbook for our new home. And though I still use Marion&#8217;s directions for teriyaki chicken, and though Sandy&#8217;s roasted veggies are still a favorite at [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":10,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[85,81,1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-754","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-love-and-romance","category-personal-stories","category-uncategorized"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO 4.9.10 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"When I was about to be married, the women of my church threw me a shower, at which each of them gave me a favorite recipe to put in a cookbook for our new home. 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