{"id":6177,"date":"2026-03-11T02:01:21","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T02:01:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/2025\/05\/20\/write-of-passage-fire-frolic-and-the-fragile-threads-of-humanity\/"},"modified":"2026-03-11T02:01:21","modified_gmt":"2026-03-11T02:01:21","slug":"write-of-passage-fire-frolic-and-the-fragile-threads-of-humanity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/2026\/03\/11\/write-of-passage-fire-frolic-and-the-fragile-threads-of-humanity\/","title":{"rendered":"Write of Passage: Fire, Frolic, and the Fragile Threads of Humanity"},"content":{"rendered":"<!--[if lt IE 9]><script>document.createElement('audio');<\/script><![endif]-->\n<audio class=\"wp-audio-shortcode\" id=\"audio-6177-1\" preload=\"none\" style=\"width: 100%;\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"audio\/mpeg\" src=\"https:\/\/api.substack.com\/feed\/podcast\/163986791\/e89cdd1b04b05b2090c7d65839bff0a2.mp3?_=1\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/api.substack.com\/feed\/podcast\/163986791\/e89cdd1b04b05b2090c7d65839bff0a2.mp3\">https:\/\/api.substack.com\/feed\/podcast\/163986791\/e89cdd1b04b05b2090c7d65839bff0a2.mp3<\/a><\/audio>\n<p>This week, I went through a whirlwind of emotions\u2014yes, whirlwind. That\u2019s the word. It captures the highs and lows, the unpredictable moments, the shared grief, reflection, and the surprising grace that shaped these past few days. All these feelings\u2014they live in pictures.<\/p><div id=\"vanes-3462229243\" class=\"vanes-content vanes-entity-placement\" style=\"margin-top: 2px;margin-right: 2px;margin-bottom: 2px;margin-left: 2px;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/fireswordandsea.htm\" aria-label=\"Fire Sword &amp; Sea\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?fit=1706%2C2560&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Fire Sword &amp; Sea\"  srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?w=1706&ssl=1 1706w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=200%2C300&ssl=1 200w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=683%2C1024&ssl=1 683w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=768%2C1152&ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=1024%2C1536&ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?resize=1365%2C2048&ssl=1 1365w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/FireSwordSea_HC-scaled.jpg?w=1280&ssl=1 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" width=\"569\" height=\"853\"   \/><\/a><\/div>\n<p>Picture this: an artist gifted in creating larger-than-life floral and celebratory installations-roses, sunflowers, and even huge gift boxes with perfect bows. I found one of her creations buried among the thousands of photos on my phone. I went searching for it after hearing she died\u2014suddenly\u2014of a heart attack. She was in her mid-forties. I\u2019d only seen her two or three times, but every encounter was vibrant. She was joyful, always present, always tweaking one last detail so others would want to take a picture beside her work. Her name was Mary. She made an impact. I look at that photo and smile, remembering her smile.<\/p>\n<p>This loss was sudden. Mary was very close to a friend of mine. Mary was central to my friend\u2019s community. When your friend grieves someone central to their world, you grieve with them. And in that shared sorrow, something happens. You become deeply grateful\u2014not just for what you have, but for the very fact that your people are still here. You reflect. You look at your own life, and the things you were grumbling about five minutes ago suddenly don\u2019t matter so much. Perspective shows up, kicks you in the pants\u2014uninvited, but necessary.<\/p>\n<p>Then, another picture: a fire. Not just any fire\u2014the one that consumed <strong>Nottoway Plantation<\/strong>, the largest antebellum plantation that was still standing in the United States. A place layered with contradictions, history, and pain. The blaze left it gutted. I studied the photos\u2014before, during, and after. I watched the memes\u2014because TikTok, Threads, and Instagram are unmatched when it comes to irony and reaction. Beyond the satire, there is truth.<\/p>\n<p>No one died in the fire. But that doesn\u2019t erase the deaths that still haunt that land\u2014the men, women, and children who lived, labored, and died under a brutal system of forced servitude. Some say Nottoway is haunted. It should be. The owners memorialized the slave drivers&#8217; quarters. I like to think the spirits of the enslaved were there, too, watching the flames, bearing witness as the restored \u201cMassa\u2019s house\u201d turned to ash.<\/p>\n<p>Nottoway was a tourist site, a wedding venue, a workplace, a symbol. People will be out of work. The state will take an economic hit. These are facts. But there is a deeper truth that sits beside those facts: Nottoway was a <strong>sugar plantation<\/strong>. And sugar plantations were among the worst of all plantation systems.<\/p>\n<p>I know this because of the research I did for <a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/bookshop.org\/p\/books\/sister-mother-warrior-vanessa-riley\/17445709?ean=9780063073555&#038;next=t\"><em>Sister Mother Warrior<\/em><\/a><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/bookshop.org\/p\/books\/sister-mother-warrior-vanessa-riley\/17445709?ean=9780063073555&#038;next=t\"> <\/a>and <a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/thenovelneighbor.com\/item\/MEgaIBq6_d-e75DZ71DChg\"><em>Island Queen<\/em><\/a>. The facts still haunt me:<\/p>\n<p>* The <strong>death rate<\/strong> on sugar plantations in the Caribbean and southern states was <strong>three to four times higher<\/strong> than on cotton plantations.<\/p>\n<p>* Enslaved people on U.S. cotton plantations had a life expectancy of <strong>30\u201335 years<\/strong>. On sugar plantations, it was often <strong>10 years or less<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>* The work was brutal\u2014cutting cane, operating machinery, surviving the suffocating heat of the boiler houses.<\/p>\n<p>* If you were sentenced to work the boiling vats, it was basically a death sentence. Dehydration, exhaustion, and the relentless heat killed faster than the whip. And that doesn&#8217;t count the beatings, the rapes, and the starvation.<\/p>\n<p>I made a post about the fire on Instagram. Most of the responses were respectful. But some fixated on the &#8220;grandeur&#8221; lost\u2014as if it were Notre Dame. Others insisted I should \u201cget over it.\u201d That all the perpetrators are dead. That the world should move on. Let\u2019s put in pin in this moving notion. I\u2019ll circle back.<\/p>\n<p>Another disturbing image circulating came from still of Nottoway\u2019s scripted tours praising the &#8220;humanity&#8221; of the plantation, claiming it trained a nurse and built a hospital for the enslaved. That is a lie. There was no formal training. They likely identified a woman who showed skill with herbs and healing and used her ancestorial knowledge. The hospital was not about care\u2014it was about <strong>profit<\/strong>. It was cheaper to repair a broken body than to buy a new one. These \u201chospitals\u201d weren\u2019t acts of mercy. They were <strong>maintenance hubs for human chattel<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>One of the worst stories I came across still wakes me up at night. A method of execution used on some sugar plantations: the \u201c<strong>sugar death<\/strong>.\u201d An enslaved person would be buried up to the neck in sand. Then, boiling sugar syrup was poured over their exposed skin\u2014usually the head. The syrup burned and blistered, but that wasn\u2019t the end. The spilled sugar attracted the ants. The person would die slowly, in excruciating pain, as ants devoured them alive. It was sadism as spectacle. A warning. A lesson. A horror.<\/p>\n<p>How exactly do you \u201cget over\u201d that? How do you erase the knowledge that human beings <strong>chose<\/strong> to do that to others\u2014and passed it on, generation after generation? How do you get over knowing that, given the chance, there are people today who would do the same?<\/p>\n<p>But then, a final image. This saved my writing week. It was a photo of <strong>frolic<\/strong>. Two Black women\u2014one in a sleek column dress, the other in a romantic, flowy one\u2014running joyfully through a green field in <strong>Vatican City<\/strong>. The sun is shining. I imagine the smell of olives in the air, the promise of wine at sunset. <strong>Gayle King and Oprah<\/strong>, radiant, laughing, free. That image brought me back to smiling Mary. Not because it was glamorous, but because it reminded me of <strong>joy, personal joy<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>We need joy. We need moments of frolic. In the middle of pain, of grief, of hard histories\u2014we have to fight for joy. We must protect it, speak to it, defend it. Frolicking is resistance. It\u2019s choosing self, choosing family, choosing rest, choosing humanity.<\/p>\n<p>So yes\u2014we mourn. We reflect. We carry reverence for the past, the true past. But we must also <strong>touch grass<\/strong>, run barefoot through a field, choosing self, friends, and family.<\/p>\n<p>To those who are grieving, I offer this: find one photo. One memory. One moment that brings you joy. Hold on to it. Then look for more. Or make more, one moment at a time.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Books that can help you focus on joy and history in meaningful ways are:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/thenovelneighbor.com\/item\/1iqMaW6srnNt06E_l_wwqA\"><strong>Before I Let Go <\/strong><\/a><strong>by Kennedy Ryan<\/strong><strong>A second-chance romance that explores grief, healing, and Black joy.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/thenovelneighbor.com\/item\/b1VOIlIvk3P91U6V4cGbhA\"><strong>The Warmth of Other Suns <\/strong><\/a><strong>by Isabel Wilkerson<\/strong><strong>Epic account of the Great Migration\u2014deeply researched and emotionally charged.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/thenovelneighbor.com\/item\/UPeceejxZgdBuWxgrPWwNA\"><strong>What the Fireflies Knew <\/strong><\/a><strong>by Kai Harris<\/strong><strong>A coming-of-age story told through the eyes of a young Black girl navigating grief and growing up in 1990s Michigan.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/thenovelneighbor.com\/item\/ymASTSSKIbaFxjrDKwK0XQ\"><strong>The Heaven &#038; Earth Grocery Store <\/strong><\/a><strong>by James McBride<\/strong><strong>A community of outsiders in 1920s Pottstown, PA, comes together around a hidden deaf boy\u2014tender, funny, and full of humanity.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>And of course<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/thenovelneighbor.com\/item\/MEgaIBq6_d-e75DZ71DChg\"><strong>Island Queen<\/strong><\/a>: A historical novel based on the real-life rise of Dorothy Kirwan Thomas\u2014her rise from enslavement to one of the wealthiest women in the Caribbean.<\/p>\n<p><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/bookshop.org\/p\/books\/sister-mother-warrior-vanessa-riley\/17445709?ean=9780063073555&#038;next=t\"><strong>Sister Mother Warrior<\/strong><\/a>: An epic saga of resistance, sisterhood, and revolution\u2014based on the true story of the women who helped shape the Haitian fight for freedom.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Show notes include a list of the books mentioned in this broadcast. This week, I&#8217;m highlighting <\/strong><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.hubcity.org\/\"><strong>Hub City Books<\/strong><\/a><strong> through their website and <\/strong><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/bookshop.org\/shop\/hubcitybooks\"><strong>Bookshop.org<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>You can find my notes on Substack or on my website, <\/strong><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.vanessariley.com\/\"><strong>VanessaRiley.com<\/strong><\/a><strong> under the podcast link in the About tab.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>If this essay touched you or lit a spark, show some love\u2014hit like and subscribe to <\/strong><strong><em>Write of Passage<\/em><\/strong><strong>!&#8221;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Thank you for listening. Hopefully, you\u2019ll come again. This is Vanessa Riley.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This is a public episode. If you&#8217;d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit <a href=\"https:\/\/vanessariley.substack.com\/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&#038;utm_campaign=CTA_2\">vanessariley.substack.com\/subscribe<\/a><\/p>\n<p id=\"rop\"><small>Originally posted 2025-05-20 13:10:00. <\/small><\/p><div id=\"vanes-4105706764\" class=\"vanes-after-content vanes-entity-placement\" style=\"margin-top: 3px;margin-right: 3px;margin-bottom: 3px;margin-left: 3px;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?fit=1080%2C1350&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Listen to the Write of Passage Weekly Podcast\"  srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?w=1080&ssl=1 1080w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?resize=240%2C300&ssl=1 240w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?resize=819%2C1024&ssl=1 819w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/SubstackAd.png?resize=768%2C960&ssl=1 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" width=\"540\" height=\"675\"   \/><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This week, I went through a whirlwind of emotions\u2014yes, whirlwind. That\u2019s the word. It captures the highs and lows, the unpredictable moments, the shared grief, reflection, and the surprising grace that shaped these past few days. All these feelings\u2014they live in pictures. Picture this: an artist gifted in creating larger-than-life floral and celebratory installations-roses, sunflowers, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6208,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[81,793,9,620,756,694],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6177","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-personal-stories","category-politics","category-recommended-reading","category-syndication","category-technology","category-tv-and-film"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/2fedfd93425b9be1279fda010b081e92-scaled.jpg?fit=1920%2C2560&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6177","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6177"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6177\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6208"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6177"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6177"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanessariley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6177"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}